Julie Lythcott-Haims

Is it scary out there in the wide-open landscape of life where you fend for yourself and where anything is possible? Yeah.

But you have to. And you must want to. And you need to learn how.

It’s your turn.

your partner is terminally ill, drop everything and be together—though I hope to God I never “need” to do it.)

Fending is knowing it’s on you to handle something and you’re pretty sure you can at least give it a try.

When we’re successfully fending for ourselves, life is more like a game with an evenly matched opponent. You win some points, you lose some, you keep going.

Fending means being responsible and accountable

Berea College does in fact offer free education for all, and is considered a top liberal arts college in the country, featuring some of the very best teaching

You are fending if you’re able to fix it yourself, or if you’re the one calling AAA, the mechanic, or a friend all by yourself—and that’s what Dan and I did, which you’d expect us to be able to do because we are in our fifties, but anyone licensed to operate a motor vehicle should be able to do this.)

When we make it onto that next rung on the ladder of success, we can feel like we really have to make time for that person who reaches out, even if we aren’t close to them or it’s not what we want to do.

Fending boils down to knowing you are the person who is in charge of things in your life.

“I’m here to learn and grow.”