Reardon Publishing

Being a vampire is not like in the movies; it is boring, and having the whole world out to get you just because you have better teeth than they do is unfair and totally specie-ist. I don’t go on about humans having short puny teeth and odd smells, now, do I?
Well, to try and educate you a little before the bell rings and you all go back to the trees with the other apes, I am going to explain just how and why my life is so unfair in being a teenage vampire.
Where should I start? No, not at the beginning, unless you wish me to discuss potty training or my special gift of being sick over things that were dry-clean only. Instead, let me start at the worst age possible, like right now: a teenager, and at a time in my life when I could die a thousand deaths daily in indescribable ways as I am forced to face the unending, living hell. Yes, you guessed it; it’s called high school.
And by the way, my name is Amy, and this is my life, if you can call it a life. Okay, so just sit back, shut up, and let me tell you all about it; if you fidget, then I should warn you that I was not joking about having better teeth than you, and they are sharp!

all she knew was that she was a living vampire

and at a time in my life when I could die a thousand deaths daily in indescribable ways as I am forced to face the unending, living hell. Yes, you guessed it; it’s called high school.