Janet Taylor

here are people who share their emotions with others, and bond with them in this way. And there are people who keep their emotions to themselves, and gain approval through a cool demeanour of steady reliability.

wing, embracing, integrating.

Other people’s love and approval are the drugs that we can’t live without, and will do anything to get.

These negative feelings are not really true, they don’t relate to what we are in reality, but only to what we’ve learned to think about ourselves.

fear is the cause, getting stuck in a pattern is the effect. All patterns arise from our fear of rejection, and the result is always more self-rejection.

merely fleeting moments

sow the seeds

suffering and develop the skilful means that will lead you to unconditional happiness. You will then, and only then, be able to engage in truly loving relationships. And if you happen to get that fantastic job or that new house, then great – but your happiness will no longer depend on it.

We all spent our first years of life in a state of true dependency and existential fear of rejection. That fear is thus originally a fear of abandonment, and in essence a fear of death. Therefore, it is no wonder that we have this fear for the rest of our lives, and try our best to keep it hidden. Fear is the deepest force behind our lifelong striving to gain the love and approval of others.

I have no right to exist