Ellen DeGeneres

The Funny Thing Is

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  • Farida Osmanovahas quoted5 years ago
    Sometimes, when I'm trying to get dressed, I find myself just staring at my clothes for an hour. I have not a clue as to what I should put on. It is so hard to decide what to wear. And it got me thinking: That's why prison wouldn't be so bad.
  • Farida Osmanovahas quoted6 years ago
    Life is short. If you doubt me, ask a butterfly. Their average life span is a mere five to fourteen days.
  • Farida Osmanovahas quoted6 years ago
    That's nothing," she said, preening
  • Farida Osmanovahas quoted6 years ago
    As I finished reading my list I suddenly felt sad and empty. Maybe it's because you're hungry,
  • Farida Osmanovahas quoted6 years ago
    So I was driving again… back to the loving place… praying I'd be led to where I was supposed to be, and suddenly a wave of energy hit me. You're out of rum. If you're quiet, it will come.
  • Farida Osmanovahas quoted6 years ago
    And she said, "Oh, I'm sorry, I've already started writing, I can't stop."

    "Oh, that's how it works? You've already started writing, so you can't stop? Okay, well I would like to not hit you but my fist is already in the air, okay?"

    And … back to the loving place
  • Farida Osmanovahas quoted6 years ago
    The parking situation is crazy because the world is overpopulated with the wrong kinds of people.
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