The idea is to release them while some guy in a suit (but also wearing sandals with white socks) sings about love being the answer to everything.
I watch in horror.
I know for a fact that the latex lumps will end up tangled in electrical wires.
They will find their way into rivers and streams, and even travel for miles out into oceans, where they will choke fish and endanger marine mammals.
But I cannot find my voice to do anything about these future calamities, because it is someone’s idea of inspirational to release the bobbing weapons.
Out of the corner of my eye I see a toddler refusing to let go of his helium prize.
His parents finally manage to pry the ribbon from his clenched fist.
As the four-year-old sobs in agony, I know that he is the only one here who understands.