Henry Cloud,John Townsend

Boundaries Updated and Expanded Edition

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Boundaries is the book that's helped over 4 million people learn when to say yes and know how to say no in order to take control of their lives.
Does your life feel like it's out of control? Perhaps you feel like you have to say yes to everyone's requests. Maybe you find yourself readily taking responsibility for others' feelings and problems. Or perhaps you focus so much on being loving and unselfish that you've forgotten your own limits and limitations. Or maybe it's all of the above.
In the New York Times bestseller, Boundaries, Drs. Henry Cloud and John Townsend help you learn when to say yes and know how to say no in order to take control of your life and set healthy, biblical boundaries with your spouse, children, friends, parents, co-workers, and even yourself.
Now updated and expanded for the digital age, this book continues to help millions of people around the world answer these tough questions:
Can I set limits and still be a loving person?What are legitimate boundaries?How do I effectively manage my digital life so that it doesn't control me?What if someone is upset or hurt by my boundaries?How do I answer someone who wants my time, love, energy, or money?Why do I feel guilty or afraid when I consider setting boundaries?How do boundaries relate to mutual submission within marriage?Aren’t boundaries selfish?You don’t have to let your life spiral out of control. Discover how boundaries make life better today!
Plus, check out Boundaries family collection of books dedicated to key areas of life — dating, marriage, raising kids, parenting teens, and leadership. Workbooks and Spanish editions are also available.
This book is currently unavailable
421 printed pages
Original publication
2017
Publication year
2017
Have you already read it? How did you like it?
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Impressions

  • Иванов Алексейshared an impression4 years ago
    👍Worth reading
    💡Learnt A Lot
    🚀Unputdownable
    💤Borrrriiinnng!

    Очень хорошая книга, объясняющая концепт личных границ в различных сферах жизни. Есть две очень крутые главы про жизнь человека без личных границ (курильщика) и человека со здоровыми личными границами. На контрасте очень хорошо прослеживается разница)
    В общем если бы я прочитал что-то такое в детстве, то был бы точно другим человеком. В советском майндсете родителей очень часто встречается тема манипулирования детьми через guilt messages. Поэтому рекомендую прочитать главу про жизнь человека без границ всем и если в вас откликнулось, то продолжить читать)
    Да, тут ещё автор - верующий, поэтому куча отсылок на библию. Я просто их стал пропускать, в целом не особо напрягало, кроме пары странных чисто христианских убеждений автора.

Quotes

  • Иванов Алексейhas quoted4 years ago
    f you have been raised in a family that said implicitly or explicitly that your boundaries are bad, you know what I am talking about. When you say no to a request, you feel guilty. When you do not allow someone to take advantage of you, you feel guilty. When you separate from the family to create a life of your own, you feel guilty. If you do not rescue someone who is irresponsible, you feel guilty. The list goes on.

    Guilt will keep you from doing what is right and will keep you stuck. Many people do not have good boundaries because they are afraid of disobeying the internal parent inside their heads.
  • Иванов Алексейhas quoted4 years ago
    Many depressed people suffer from a syndrome called “learned helplessness,” in which they have been taught that whatever they do will make no difference on the outcome. Many dysfunctional families caught in destructive cycles reinforce this in their children. But when you grow up and see other options that will make a difference, you do not have to stay stuck in the helplessness you learned at home.
  • Иванов Алексейhas quoted4 years ago
    Another powerful internal resistance to setting boundaries is the fear of the unknown. Being controlled by others is a safe prison. We know where all the rooms are. As one woman said, “I didn’t want to move out of hell. I knew the names of all the streets!”

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