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Jennette McCurdy

I'm Glad My Mom Died

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A heartbreaking and hilarious memoir by iCarly and Sam & Cat star Jennette McCurdy about her struggles as a former child actor--including eating disorders, addiction, and a complicated relationship with her overbearing mother--and how she retook control of her life.
Jennette McCurdy was six years old when she had her first acting audition. Her mother's dream was for her only daughter to become a star, and Jennette would do anything to make her mother happy. So she went along with what Mom called “calorie restriction,” eating little and weighing herself five times a day. She endured extensive at-home makeovers while Mom chided, “Your eyelashes are invisible, okay? You think Dakota Fanning doesn't tint hers?” She was even showered by Mom until age sixteen while sharing her diaries, email, and all her income.
In I'm Glad My Mom Died, Jennette recounts all this in unflinching detail--just as she chronicles what happens when the dream finally comes true. Cast in a new Nickelodeon series called iCarly, she is thrust into fame. Though Mom is ecstatic, emailing fan club moderators and getting on a first-name basis with the paparazzi («Hi Gale!”), Jennette is riddled with anxiety, shame, and self-loathing, which manifest into eating disorders, addiction, and a series of unhealthy relationships. These issues only get worse when, soon after taking the lead in the iCarly spinoff Sam & Cat alongside Ariana Grande, her mother dies of cancer. Finally, after discovering therapy and quitting acting, Jennette embarks on recovery and decides for the first time in her life what she really wants.
Told with refreshing candor and dark humor, I'm Glad My Mom Died is an inspiring story of resilience, independence, and the joy of shampooing your own hair.
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308 printed pages
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Quotes

  • Daniela Castillohas quoted2 years ago
    My mom didn’t deserve her pedestal. She was a narcissist. She refused to admit she had any problems, despite how destructive those problems were to our entire family. My mom emotional y, mental y, and physical y abused me in ways that wil forever impact me.
  • Daniela Castillohas quoted2 years ago
    Why do we romanticize the dead? Why can’t we be honest about them?

    Especial y moms. They’re the most romanticized of anyone.

    Moms are saints. Angels by merely existing. NO ONE could possibly understand what it’s like to be a mom. Men wil never understand. Women with

    no children wil never understand. No one but moms know the hardship of motherhood, and we non-moms must heap nothing but praise upon moms because we lowly, pitiful non-moms are mere peasants compared to the goddesses we cal mothers.

    Maybe I feel this way now because I viewed my mom that way for so long. I had her up on a pedestal, and I know how detrimental that pedestal was to my wel -being and life. That pedestal kept me stuck, emotional y stunted, living in fear, dependent, in a near constant state of emotional pain and without the tools to even identify that pain let alone deal with it.
  • Daniela Castillohas quoted2 years ago
    Typical y I wouldn’t expect a cal from her these days. We’ve drifted apart. It’s a sad reality for me in my late twenties. At the beginning of the decade, the people I was close to seemed like friends for life, people I could never imagine not seeing every day. But life happens. Love happens. Loss happens. Change and growth happen at di erent paces for di erent people, and sometimes the paces just don’t line up. It’s devastating if I think too much about it, so I usual y don’t.

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