Just a Bit Confusing (Straight Guys Book 5)

Grinning, Ryan wrapped him in his arms and held onto him—his best friend, his lover, his other half, his happiness. Labels didn’t matter if they all meant the same thing:

Jamie.

Hannah was his love, but she couldn’t fill that place in his heart that had been occupied ever since one pale, ridiculously posh boy had imprinted on him like a baby duck and started following him around.

Ryan smiled at the memory, a rush of affection tightening his throat

“I don’t like the person I become without you. I’m not sure I even know that person.”

“You know what’s stupid? That you think you aren’t my concern. You’ll stop being my concern when I’m dead.”

“Tell me what’s wrong.”

Ryan almost smiled. Everyone around him seemed to think there was something wrong with him: his brothers, his colleagues, his friends, and now Hannah. The truth was, he wasn’t at all sure there was anything wrong with him. He was starting to suspect this was the real him. Maybe he was born an asshole and Jamie had just made him softer. Ryan cringed a little as the mere thought of Jamie brought on the barrage of conflicting thoughts and feelings he preferred not to examine too closely.

He had never noticed how much time he spent thinking about him until he consciously tried to stop.

It’s wrong and weird only for as long as you let it be.

He’d always known that his affection for Jamie was a little weird, a little too much, a little too possessive and protective. Even when he’d had nothing, he wanted to give Jamie everything, addicted to the feeling of taking care of him.

“You’re still young and don’t understand that we can’t always have what we want. Sometimes what we want is irrelevant. Sometimes what we want is impossible.”

“I want whatever you’re willing to give me for as long as it will last.”