Black Sunday

I think families who spend a lot of time arguing about the small stuff do it because they do not have the courage to talk about the big things.

Many people feel pressured to fill silences with words, to give more information, or to ask you to convince them that what they have spoken to you is still on your mind. I do not like forced discussions.

People are predictably selfish, we are born selfish, even little babies; notice how hard they cry when they need something, screaming and demanding to have their needs met immediately. Selfishness is normal, human.

Taiwo, ile-oko ile ogun, marriage is a battleground

The arrogance of power is easily explained as well. If there is any confusion, it lies in why young girls grow into women legitimizing the very systems that shame and vilify our femininity.

She is just a girl. She has no idea that mothering is a lifelong entanglement to families, she does not know that she does not want this lifelong connection to Rosetta or to Teddy.

The older Yoruba believed that identical twins shared a soul before birth, that the length of their lives was nothing but a conscious uncoupling of souls. When one twin died young, they believed the living twin was in danger of dying as wel

“A girl becomes a woman when she finds a man she would do anything for.”

But what is a girl’s beauty, but a man’s promise of reward? What was my beauty but a proclamation of potential, an illusion of choice?

“If I could change anything, I’d choose to not be a twin. Even though I love being a twin, and appreciate the intense connection I have with her, sometimes I wish I wasn’t a twin. It’s been difficult learning independence.”