What Every BODY Is Saying: An Ex-FBI Agent's Guide to Speed Reading People

In my experience, I find the leg cleanser to be very significant because it occurs so quickly in reaction to a negative event. I have observed this action for years in cases when suspects are presented with damning evidence, such as pictures of a crime scene with which they are already familiar (guilty knowledge). This cleansing/pacifying behavior accomplishes two things at once. It dries sweaty palms and pacifies through tactile stroking. You can also see it when a seated couple is bothered or interrupted by an unwelcome intruder, or when someone is struggling to remember a name

When we are confident and comfortable, we spread out. When we are less secure, we tend to take up less space. In extreme circumstances, distressed people may fold their arms and legs into their own body, assuming an almost fetal position. Uncomfortable conversations and interviews can evoke a variety of withdrawn postures: arms that are intertwined like a pretzel and/or ankles that are locked in place, sometimes to the point of being almost painful to the observer. Look especially for dramatic changes in body position that could be indicative of deception, particularly when they occur concurrently with a specific change of topic.

book is about signs, too. When it comes to human behavior, there are basically two kinds of signs, verbal and nonverbal. All of us have been taught to look for and identify the verbal signs. By analogy, those are the ones that are located on poles, clearly visible as we drive down the streets of a strange city. Then there are the nonverbal signs, the ones that have always been there but that many of us have not learned to spot because we haven’t been trained to look for and identify signs located at ground level. What’s interesting is that once we learn to attend to and read nonverbal signs, our reactions will mirror that of my friend.

“Once I knew what to look for and where to look, the signs were obvious and unmistakable. I had no trouble finding my way.”

It is my hope that through an understanding of nonverbal behavior, you will achieve a deeper, more meaningful view of the world around you—able to hear and see the two languages, spoken and silent, that combine to present the full, rich tapestry of human experience in all of its delightful complexity. This is a goal well worth pursuing, and one that with effort I know you can achieve. You now possess something powerful. You possess knowledge that will enrich your interpersonal relationships for the rest of your life. Enjoy knowing what every body is saying, for to that end I have dedicated myself and this book.